Ghetto Gourmet: Frito Chili Pie (or, some reasons I love my mommy)

My mother, the Supreme Overlord-Lady of the Mercenary Planet of Venshquenkle (hereafter referred to as Overlord-Lady):

(She's the one in the background. The lower half of her face is covered to protect her identity from her interplanetary rivals, who are always conspiring to "relieve her" of her empire.)

My mother is an amazing, awesome, and absolutely supportive human being. She has always been there for my brothers and me, and she still loves me after the hell I put her through as a teenager after my father died. Of course, newly teenaged when my father was diagnosed with cancer and ultimately wasted away because of it, I was completely oblivious to the fact that my mother WAS WATCHING HER HUSBAND DIE! This is one of my biggest regrets in life, and while I've tried to explain to her how awful I feel about who I was at that time, she'll never know how much that haunts me. At least not in the way my shrink does.

An interesting fact about the Overlord-Lady is that she was born without a sense of smell, the official term - anosmia. Because of the lack of her olfactory sense, her sense of taste is not all it could be. In fact, once she told me that the only was she really can tell the difference between an orange and a banana is the texture, or mouth feel (obviously, this would be the case only if she was wearing a blind fold). It used to drive me nuts when she would ask me what something smelled like, because... well, have you ever tried to describe the color red to someone born blind? Now, I try to explain in terms of emotion, if she even asks. I'm afraid I may have deterred her from the inquiry, and I am terribly sorry about that.

My mother was also unfortunate enough to have three very picky children. Somehow, I've escaped this affliction (loves my food, I do!), but my brothers are steadfast in their aversion to some of the simplest and most common foods. Oldest will only eat hamburgers completely plain - meat, bun. Not even CHEESE!!! Youngest will only eat spaghetti with parmesan cheese, which seems to me like it would be terribly dry. And I absolutely hated tuna fish and mushrooms (the former I'm coming around to, the latter I've been experimenting with). I dreaded Tuna Casserole night. There are other things they won't eat, or won't eat together, but you get the picture. The pickiness combined with the anosmia made it somewhat difficult for my mother to come up with things the whole family would eat. In fact, the only thing I remember being a hit with everyone was chili and fritos, which is one of the Overlord-Lady's favorite thing.

I love this. It makes me happy, and it makes me think of my mommy, who I love more than anything else.

(Oh, god, I want this now...)

Ain't No Shoe Maker: Individual Blackberry Cobblers

As I've mentioned before, my older brothers were boy scouts. This meant that once every summer all the troops families would get together for a family camping trip. The boys would spend their days earning their camping merit badges, and the families would hang out in the woods, go hiking, splash in the river. At night, the Scoutmaster, Mr. Pankow, would teach the boys how to cook campfire meals for their families (especially their pesky little sisters), and every year, he would make the best dessert that ever came from an outdoor fire: cherry cobbler. It was one of my favorite things about summer, and cobbler remains one of my favorite "rustic" desserts.

I've never baked on a campfire, and I'm not sure I really want to bother with camping just to get that flavor. But- I was at the store the other day and saw some amazing looking blackberries. Impulsively (because really, what do I do that isn't impulsive?) I bought some, and whipped together a couple of individual cobblers for Pitchfork and me. It was super easy, AND they were A-MAZING! (Especially with Caramel Caribou cream!)

"I Want This Forever" - Salted Caramel Buttercream

I live in an amazing part of Seattle. Three miles south, I've got ethnic food nirvana in White Center (Rat City), three miles north, the International District. To the east, there's a little mecca of Mexican food. Pho abounds, and I have my pick of dozens of Asian and South American grocery stores. We're also within "spitting distance" to a couple of awesome bakeries, and 2 amazing local ice cream shops, Husky Deli, and Full Tilt.

This story has to do with Full Tilt - at least it's role in introducing me to salted caramel. I've been exposed to salted caramel, but have always been hesitant to take the leap, even though I really love the marriage of sweet and salty. While trying to decide what I wanted for lunch, I stumbled across Full Tilt's website and noticed that on that very day, they were hosting a hip-hop show AND giving away free scoops! I read some reviews and heard they had a mean Mexican chocolate ice cream. I convinced Pitchfork that we should go there on the way home from Viva Mexico. Boy was it crowded! They've got pinball, and even if we had quarters, we couldn't have played, it was that packed. The music was grooving and everyone was having a good time.

We redeemed our free scoop tickets, I got the Mexican chocolate and Pitchfork got the -you guessed it- salted caramel. I batted my luscious lashes and I said, "IloveyoucanItasteyouricecream?" Over the sounds of hip hop, he didn't hear me, so I said it again, louder, "ILOVEYOUCANITASTEYOURICECREAM?" Eventually, he heard me and I had my first proper taste of something salted caramel. And I fell in love. I decided then and there that I would make chocolate salted caramel cupcakes for Pitchfork. And if a few fell into my mouth, well, accidents happen.

I took a few, along with some PB Hi-Hats (coming in a future post) RoachyPooh and Filthy J's house where they were participating in their girl-geek game to get a few opinions. After all, pretty much all the ladies I'd kill for were in that room, and I'd probably take a bullet for Filthy J, so I could expect them to be totally honest. Unfortunately, they were all pretty much in a sugar overload from gaming the whole weekend and eating some of The Historian's Dreamy Lemon Chiffon, so...

However, I had built the salted caramel up enough that RoachyPooh ran right into the kitchen and grabbed one. After her first bite, she said, "Mmmm... I want this forever". It made me happy, because I felt the same way!

A Quick Treat: Peanut Butter Chocolate No-Bake Cookies

Remember these?

Blobs of chocolate and peanut butter and oatmeal... Who would have thought that something soooo good would take less than ten minutes to make? I have this vague memory of one of my brothers making these when I was a small one.

Now, something you should know- even through the difficult sibling rivalry of childhood, I've always had a bit of hero worship for my brothers. My oldest brother was seven (almost eight) when I was born, and my other brother was 5. They were both boy scouts, they both played soccer, they both eventually decided on a life of public service. Oldest Brother has worked in emergency dispatch for something like 20 years and has been trained as a hostage negotiator, along with some other pretty cool stuff. Youngest Brother has been in the volunteer fire department since high school, and has risen to the rank of Lieutenant. They've always been super-cool in my eyes, and I'm sure that I was the right little pest when I was a little kid, following them about, and swooning over their "ultra-hot" friends with my little girl friends.

Now, with a lifetime between that little girl and me, I wish that my brothers and I were closer, but I am glad that we are a close as we are.

Whenever I feel like I want a little taste of that feeling of being around my heroes, I whip up a batch of these cookies. They're super quick to make, and relatively mess free, and worth their weight in heart-gold.

Cake Mix Hack # 1 - Strawberry Lemonade Cupcakes

Alright- I love "from scratch" cooking just as much as the next girl who loves "from scratch" cooking, but sometimes I just want to take the easy way out.

Every once in a while on a Sunday, one of my old roommates from PlymouthHaus, RoachyPooh, and I plan a big potluck style meal for some of our friends. We call it Soul Food Sunday, and it's a tradition going all the way back to when we lived together. RoachyPooh is one of my very best friends, and my favorite person to be in the kitchen with. Funny thing, though- She didn't like me when we first met. How could that be?!? Well, we've gotten over that, and I am sooooo glad.

In case you're wondering, here she is with a basket of her AMAZING Heirloom Fried Chicken:

 Isn't she adorable?

Anyway, since we were having soul food, I decided I was making some biscuits and gravy, which you may recall is one of my specialties, but what about my newest obsession, cupcakes? I wanted to keep them in general  the southern food theme, but I didn't want to make Red Velvet. I mean, it's good and all, but in my opinion, a bit overrated. Maybe I just haven't had any really good red velvet cake?

Then it hit me, Strawberry Lemonade. Perhaps that's not very southern, but to my northwestern sensibilities, it seems like it would be very Virginian. Which is in the south, right? After looking about the interwebz for the perfect recipe, I found this one at Cafe Zupas, which intrigued me, both for the soda pop, and the cake-mix hack. I feel like a renegade when I refuse to use the directions on the box!

If you've looked at the recipe, you'll no doubt notice there is no strawberry to be found. That was easy, though, I just swapped the lemon-lime soda for some Nesbitt's Strawberry. YUM!

Take a gander at the finished product - pretty!